I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
