Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
