Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize