week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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