You're completely useless in the revolution.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize