all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
