I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Is this like a preordered booty call?
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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