ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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