if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
