She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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