We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
