the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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