I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Dick very happy bro
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
