A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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