DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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