he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
