Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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