never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize
