A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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