I feel like I'm in dance class right now
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
