My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
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