i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize