Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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