I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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