About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize