Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Randomize
