I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
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I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.