I will die if light touches me.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
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