no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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