it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
