You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
