Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I currently don't understand fingers.
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