I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
she pinky promised me she was 18
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
