508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
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Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?