i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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