Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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