oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize
