She went from zero to smokin in five shots
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Randomize
