But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
