No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize