The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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