That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
