Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
