Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
