Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Randomize
