So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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