Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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