Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(858): View more from California

I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.

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(707): View more from California

get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.

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(862): View more from New Jersey

My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job

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(219): View more from Indiana

my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus

(317): View more from Indiana

and who said we didn't have goals?

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23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.

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(404): View more from Georgia

I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD

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(334): View more from Alabama

As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.

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(816): View more from Missouri

He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.

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