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• (302): View more from Delaware

  remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block

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• (416): View more from Ontario

  dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (479): View more from Arkansas

  I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...

  (1-479): View more from Arkansas

  I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.

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• (281): View more from Texas

  A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.

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• (805): View more from California

  If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (817): View more from Texas

  I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.

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• (218): View more from Minnesota

  Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!

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• (716): View more from New York

  Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.

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• (778): View more from British Columbia

  He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.

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