We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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