Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
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